Gifts

Christmas/New Year 2010 at Safe Haven, Kiev

Monday night, we were watching the movie The Nativity with the boys at Teamworks when one of them asked why we give presents on Christmas. It was one of those perfectly timed questions as right then, the movie showed the Wise Men presenting Mary and Joseph with gifts for Jesus. Right after that, we gave the guys stockings that Sharon Cummisky had gotten and filled up for all of the guys.

The reaction was amazing.

Most of the guys we have are pretty guarded, but after we handed out the stockings, each guy gave both Cheryl and I hugs and one guy, Al, put his head on Cheryl's shoulder and said thank you. Usually Al walks right out after the study. The youngest of the guys, Ned, said that getting the stocking made his bad day good and another guy said, "Christmas at Teamworks is pretty good." Cheryl and I both left with the feeling that we'd seen a side of those guys that only God can bring out.

God gave me two other gifts that same day: First, Matt and I got to see Igor from the orphanage in Kaniv who is staying with friends for 4 weeks (7 kids came over from the orphanage this time). Matt and Christy said that Igor has been laughing and playing with their kids like he was part of the family. He was so happy to see Matt and me that he gave big hugs and made us promise to come back.

Then that night as I was winding down, my phone rang and it was Kreg, who lived with us at the Straight Ahead discipleship home and then in independent living 16 years ago. We hadn't heard from Kreg in 14 years and Deb and I had prayed for many years that he would contact us. Kreg is doing great, is involved with his church and just wanted reconnect and to thank Scott, Hanne and me for being a part of his life.

Not a bad way to start off the week when we get to focus just a bit more on the many gifts the Lord gives us.

Prayer from the heart

Lydia with her boys and a "Praying Hands" gift from prayer partners

One thing that I've consistently seen over the last 20 years of working with kids in juvenile detention centers and prisons in America and overseas is how similar the kids are and how broken they are. I just read that 80% of the kids in one juvenile colony in Ukraine are there for stealing food to survive because they were abandoned by their families or left on their own as their parents lost their battles with addiction.

That affliction is here in the States too. Last night, Cheryl and I had a Bible study at a local detention center in Plymouth. When I read the prayer requests from the guys, two of them hit me in the heart and I want to share them with you (I'm changing the names, but God knows them):

Rick-I want to pray for my sister and hope the best for her since she's the only family I have left.

Jimmy-I want to pray for my mom to be safe and to stop using heroin.

When you read about "those type of kids" pray for them and think of what is behind that. "But go and learn what this means, 'I desire compassion and not sacrifice,' for I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners" Matt. 9:13.

Selflessness

Atyom and Me

Every once in a while, the Lord gives us someone special who continues to amaze us and change our world in subtle ways. I met Artyom, a/k/a Zhivchik (loosely translated "hyper boy") when he was 13 and had just come to the orphanage after his father almost beat him to death. He was pretty much out of control, but there was something special about him for sure. He would jump on me, take my camera and run away and generally be a pain in the butt--my nickname for him is "zanoza" which means splinter, as in "splinter in the butt".

Zhivchik is now 17 and is in his last year at the orphanage. He has matured, but still has a zest for life, a smile and heart that I pray will never be dimmed. At the camp we did for the kids at the orphanage, Zhivchik did something that showed me his heart; he was ladling out soup for all of the kids at our table and when he was doing the last bowl for Vanya, he saw that there was not enough left for a full bowl. Many other kids would have just passed it on, but without hesitation, Zhivchik took the ladle, scooped soup out from his own bowl and gave it to Vanya. Then he sat down and we prayed.

The crew as we were leaving the camp...Artyom on my shoulders in what he calls our "tradition".

I don't know why that hit me like it did, but maybe it was because it was one of the most purely selfless acts that I have seen from anyone. It was also a challenge and a reminder of what "doing unto others" truly means. I love that kid.

Known by Love

Lydia and her boys.

At the end of our last meeting with the boys in the juvenile prison colony, Lydia took out a bag of pears and apples that she had taken from her garden at home. She saw that there were six guys with us and she carefully arranged six equal rows for each of the boys. They all stood around Lydia, waited and then thanked her. All of them were there for the first time, as was Pasha, my interpreter. When Pasha saw how Lydia was with the boys and how they were with her, he teared up and said, "she really loves them, doesn't she? And they love her already."

How that is possible? How can love appear instantaneously between kids in prison and an 86 year old retired nurse? "By this all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13:38. God is love and it's God's love alive in us that makes this possible.

And yet, He gives all of us the choice on what, if anything, we will do with that love.

Names of Souls

Friends of mine in different ministries often hear from supporters asking them "how many times did you share the Gospel this last month?" or "how many made professions of faith from your ministry?" Recently, one of those friends asked me if I get those questions, given the population with whom we work. I thankfully told him no, that the people who are a part of this ministry are concerned about "James" or "Yura" or "Alina" or "Ryan" and not about numbers, which we can't ever know anyway.

Doug and Suzie Stoddard and 'their kids' last winter.

This last week, Doug Stoddard, Lexi, Daniel, Jana (from Manna Int'l.) and I went to visit the orphanage in Kamarivka where Doug has been ministering for years. We visited kids there, played some soccer, held them, hugged them and told them how important they are to the Lord and to us. Then we visited Alina in the hospital where she was dropped off because of a bad infection. Doug is so good at visiting and just being. For Alina, it was as if light had come into her life and she was all smiles. Jesus won't ask about a soul count, but will ask when did we visit Him when He was sick.

Recently, there was an article in a Lynn, Massachusetts paper about three Straight Ahead staff members who were once in gangs and who are now working with us and going to school. It was encouraging for me to read that and you can read it here: http://www.itemlive.com/articles/2011/10/05/news/news12.txt. That all started with a prison visit from Straight Ahead staff.

Sisco, Jimmy, Jeron and Alina are not statistics, but are young people whose lives have been changed by the Lord and through those whom the Lord has put in their paths. That is what matters.

A personal memorial for Justice

Twelve years ago, Justin, a/k/a Justice died from an overdose of heroin at age 20. When we read in the paper about a young addict dying, we often brush it aside as "just another junkie" who tempted fate once too often. But all of those junkies were living stories and Justin's was a part of my story too.

We met at Teamworks when he was 15. He was smart, but guarded. He had become an addict at age 10 when his uncle gave him his first taste of drugs as a birthday present. Justin would come to the Bible study Matt and I lead there, but would often sit back and just take it in. A turning point in our relationship and in his relationship with the Lord happened when both of our best friends, David and John D., drowned on the same day. I remember sitting with Justin trying to work through how that could happen and how much it hurt. Knowing that John had a strong faith helped me and I was able to share that with Justin.

When his time was done at Teamworks, I remember telling him I loved him. His reply was "yup." I smiled.

After he left Teamworks, Justin struggled with his addiction. He would get better and then relapse. He always kept in touch and would come over to the Straight Ahead discipleship home with me when we had weekly Bible studies. After the studies, I would bring him home and sometimes, we'd sit in my car for hours talking about faith and life. He was a complex and deep young man. One time when I picked him up at his grandmother's house, he handed me a book and asked if I liked Yeats. "The Irish poet? Ya, I guess", I responded, a bit shocked. "You?" I asked. "No. I love Yeats." This from the same kid who could hang out in the worst neighborhood and know everyone on the street.

In the year before he died, Justin and I would meet each week and he would call me each day. A few weeks before his death, Justin found his Bible opened to Psalm 91 and was freaked out as that had been his ex-girlfriend's favorite chapter in the Bible. He asked if I thought it was a sign from God to him. I said that I think that the Lord had been after him for a long time. After that, his faith and his heart were even deeper.

The last time I saw Justin alive was a week before his death as he was waiting to get into a rehab center. As I was leaving, he asked me to buy him cigarettes and I said no. He smiled, gave me a big hug and said, "I love you." He had started doing that each time we met or talked.

Over the last 12 years, on this day and on his birthday, I would call his mother Liz and Deb, as she also knew and loved him. I had left messages for Liz last year, but I didn't hear back from her.  Recently, I found out that Liz had passed away last year. With both her and Deb gone, I guess I needed to write this as a memorial to them and the precious young man who was not just a junkie. 

"For He will give His angels charge concerning you, to guard you in all your ways. They will bear you up in their hands, lest you strike your foot against a stone." Psalm 91:11-12

Calls

David a few years ago.

One constant in the last 21 years in this ministry has been calls from "kids" whom I've gotten to know at the detention centers or in the juvenile prisons. This past week, I was able to speak with several of those guys. Some of them, like Justin, are doing great and just want to check in to see if I'm still alive over here in Ukraine. Others are from guys I haven't heard from in a while, like David, who called from a southern state where he is now living in the woods with some other homeless guys. David has had a tough life from the get-go and we met at one of the detention centers years ago. He used to come with me for Christmas, Thanksgiving, and other events as he was a ward of the state from a young age. He has had many diagnoses, but he's a good guy and he keeps in touch--even if it's after a few years of no contact. David assures me that he is OK, but it's hard to think of him living like that. I guess Jesus did it, but it was in a bit of a different context.

Me and Yur in June

I was over a friend's place last night, when I got a call from Yura. He had been working construction for a month, with his boss telling him he would be paid "next week". His boss took off and now Yura's going to be homeless. "Can you help me?" was his question, one that's also been a constant over the years. Often times, I feel helpless, but that gets me praying and directed towards the One who can help.

Today, I'm the one making calls to see who can help Yura. The blessing is that Yura's faith is strong, as it has been since he first prayed in the juvenile prison 8 years ago. The hard part is that he is down as it's just one of numerous hits in his young life. Please keep Yura, David, Justin and all of the guys in your prayers. There's a reason why Deb used to call them our Keepers: they are gifts from the Lord.

Pain

Much has been written about the power of pain and how we need to go through it to grow. All that's true, but I still hate it. We'll all go through pain, and it will transform us, but the issue is how will it transform us? Will we be like the Psalmist and say "weeping may last for a night, but a shout of joy comes in the morning" or like Sarte who said, "Every existing thing is born without reason, prolongs itself out of weakness, and dies by chance. "

Kolya at work

Most of the kids we are blessed to work with have lives that would crush many of us. Yet most of them move on, find ways to cope, and find love and hope. One of the guys who lives in the small house with me, Kolya, is a talented artist. He grew up in the internat after being abandoned at an early age. He came to live with Bogdan and Anya, then decided to do his own thing. He ended up on the streets, homeless and alone. After a period, Kolya realized what the Lord had given him and what he wanted. He came back, was welcomed back, found faith, and now helps out with the other kids here.

Kolya and his gift for me.

Kolya's paintings and drawings often have children in them that reflect what was and what could have been in his own life. They show the pain of the past is still there, but they are also an outlet so that pain does not control.

His other paintings are mostly from Scripture and show strong figures from the Bible. I think that they are a reflection of the strength with which the Lord has blessed Kolya.

Hands and Feet

A couple of weeks ago, Lydia, Sergei, Alla and I went to the juvenile prison to do the Bible study and to spend time with the guys. Since "our" colony will be one of the four that remain open, more and more guys are coming. At the study this last time, about half of the twenty guys who came were new.

After the study, we ended up going outside into the "zone" where the kids stay and we saw a bunch of new faces. I love when we go up to the guys and start speaking with them. After some initial hesitation, they start to talk and will even ask questions. We always invite them to come to the study and many take us up on the offer.

As we were getting ready to leave, Sasha, one of the regulars, was hanging out with me and we were making fun of each other (ya, I can be cocky even in Russian. It's a gift). When it came time for us to leave, he grabbed my hand shook it, and and then gave me a big hug. At first he made light of it like it was a joke, but he didn't let go. He had done the same thing last time. He then went and gave hugs to Lyidia and Sergei and then we went out. As we were walking, he kept pace with us on the other side of the fence, prolonging our visit for as long as he could.

It hit me once again that these guys have few to hug them, to put a hand on their shoulder or to listen to them. What a blessing it is to be used by God as His hands and feet, even for just a few hugs. "And they were bringing children to Him so that he might touch them:..." Mark 10:13.

Around the world

Most of the work Straight Ahead Ministries does is in the United States and in Ukraine, but we also have affiliates in India, Canada and Nigeria and have helped others around the world who want to minister with kids in the juvenile justice system. Recently, we received word on some exciting things that are happening in India. This came out on our e-newsletter, concerning a book Straight Ahead wrote for new believers:

A Fresh Start for India   One book printed in three languages carries a message across the country Translations of A Fresh Start, printed in both Telugu and Hindi, have been widely distributed in India, thanks to the work of our ministry affiliate there.  Recently we received an exciting ministry update from India – along with a request for funds to print more copies.  Here are some highlights from that report: 5,000 copies in Hindi language are now printed and being distributed according to all of the requests we are receiving by e-mail, postal letter and mobile messages. We have received requests for "A Fresh Start" from 18 states in India. Not only Christians are being blessed, but also Hindus and Muslims. Last week a pastor from Karnataka, called to say that four people had just accepted Christ as Savior after reading the book. Many church pastors, and children and youth ministry leaders have asked us to supply copies to their churches, and to homes for children. More copies have been sent to ministry organizations, Bible colleges, students, and individuals. We could not meet several personal and bulk requests because the English copies we printed last June are out of stock. India has 28 states and 7 union territories. Almost every state has a different language. Hindi is common in the north, but over all English is the most common language. Please pray with us about meeting this need for more English copies. When we first published this 30-day devotional, told in the voice of brand-new Christian youth, we never dreamed that God would use it to encourage and support new believers all over India!   We would like to raise $2000 to help our ministry affiliate with this current need. If you can help spread the Gospel through A Fresh Start, please designate your contribution to: A Fresh Start, India.

On Wait

"Wait for the Lord; Be strong, and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:14. One time at a detention center Bible study we told the kids that God answers prayers in three ways: yes, no and wait. The next week, a kid came in, leaned over and whispered, "I'm on wait." OK, I hate waiting. Never been good at it and never liked it. I know it's good for me, especially when I'm paying attention, as the Lord often keeps us there to learn.

Yana and Seroja-Traditions!

This past weekend, some of the being on wait ended in a good way. We had a great wedding celebration for Seroja and Yana, both of whom grew up at the internat/orphanage in Kaniv, and who have lived here at the Safe Haven house for a couple of years. The wedding was in the back yard, Anya and her friends made the food, Lena made a wonderful cake, Alisa decorated the yard and took photos, Olya did hair, and everyone pitched in to make it a special day. Seroja's only blood relative, his sister, was here, but so was the family that the Lord has made for him and for Yana.

Kersa, Vova, Dima and Zhivchik

What was also nice was that kids we've gotten to know over the years from the camps, who are now on their own, also came. We were also blessed as Inna and Roma, who help out leading the camps, came up from Cherkassy with Ruslan and Zhivchik, two kids who have become a big part of my life and the lives of others who have helped at the camps. Both of them talked about wanting to live here one day when they finish at the internat. Awesome.

Me and Ruslan

Waiting is OK, but sometimes these yes's are also mighty nice. Thank you Lord.

Home for now

Sergei, Shamil, Sasha, John, Lydia, Ira

Steve Wiggins sang a song that I like with the tag line "all the darkness in the world can't put out the light of the smallest flame." When we went into the juvenile prison a couple of weeks ago, we saw some of that in action.

First, was the kid like curiosity that my watch brought out in Sasha. Sasha is a regular at the Bible study and told me that for him, it's a place of safety and hope-unlike the rest of the prison. When we were leaving, Sasha asked how old my watch was and when I told him it is at least 10 years old, he was shocked. When he asked what happens when the battery dies, I took off my watch and gave it to him and told him to shake it as it is a kinetic watch that self-winds. You would have thought that I'd given Sasha a time machine. All of a sudden, a 16 year old orphan became a 7 year old kid, shaking the watch, showing it to everyone, and smiling like there was no tomorrow. He gingerly handed it back and gave me a big hug as we left.

New room

Before that, Alexander, one of the prison officials, gave us a tour of where the boys live. Sergei told me that something had changed in the place as before, they never would have shown us that place. Alexander showed us two rooms with many beds and said that this will be where the new guys will live. Ukraine is going from 10 to 4 juvenile prisons and this one will take many of the boys. He also showed us a bathroom that the boys had redone themselves-they did a great job and you could see Alexander's pride in them. They need some help with things like chairs and cubicles for clothing so I told Alexander that we would help with that. He said that will mean a lot.

Bathroom redone by guys

This month marks 15 years that we've been going into that colony. While it's still a tough place, I can see how the Lord has blessed it, made it better and provided a more humane place for the guys. I think that Lydia Petrovna's presence and her love are key to that. Her love for the Lord and for her boys is a strong light in there.

Place of Baptism

There are times when we need a break, even when that break involves you and 38 other members of an extended family. Bogdan, Anya, Inna, Roma and I got to bring the guys and girls from the Safe Haven house, plus a group of kids who either lived here or who have become a part of our lives through past camps, to Kompass Park in the village of Khreshatic. Thanks to Alla, the director there who was able to get sponsors, we were able to bring many more kids than we thought possible.

It was fun to watch them be kids, to go swimming, to wander about the village, and to catch up with each other. Each night we had a time of sharing about who Christ is and how we can grow in our faith. Mostly, it was a time to share His love and to enjoy each others company.

As we were waiting to start one meeting, Bogdan asked us to pray for Yulia and Dasha as they were speaking with Anya about their faith. A few minutes later, Anya came in to tell us that both of them wanted to be baptized as a public showing of their desire to follow Christ.

Praying for Yulia, Dasha and Vova

We went down to the river and Bogdan and I baptized Yulia and Dasha--this was a first for me. As we were getting out of the river, Vova asked if he could be baptized too. It's hard to describe the joy that brought and the gift that it was for us.

Later, Frank from Hope Now, which started Kompass Park, told us that Khreshatic means "place of baptism." Gotta love when that happens.

Letter to an Old Man, Me

Sharon O'Fallon found this in her father's papers and Deb shared it with me several years ago. As I was going through some favorite quotes and sayings for a sermon I'm putting together, I found it and thought it would be good to share.

Dear Friend;

You're going to meet an old man someday!  Down the road ahead- 10, 20, 30 years- you'll catch up with him waiting for you there.  What kind of an old man are you going to meet?  He may be a seasoned, gracious fellow surrounded by a host of friends who call him blessed because of what his life meant to them.    He may be a bitter, disillusioned, dried up old buzzard without a good word for anybody, soured, friendless and alone.  The kind of old man you'll meet depends eventually on yourself.  Because that old man will be you!

          He is a composite of everything you do, say and think.  His mind will be set in the mold you've made by your attitudes.  His heart will be turning out what you've been putting in.  Every little thought and deed of yours goes into this old man. He'll be exactly what you make him- nothing more, nothing less.  It is up to you.  You'll have no one else to credit or blame.  Every day, in every way, you are becoming more and more like yourself--getting to look, think, and sound more like yourself.  Live now only for what you can get out of life? The old man gets smaller, drier, harder, crabbier, and more self-centered.  Open your life to others, think in terms of what you can give--the old man grows softer, kindlier, greater, and more Christ-centered.  Fact is, the hidden little things in life, attitudes, goals, ambitions, desires may seem unimportant now,  But, they're adding up inside where you can't see them, crystallizing in your heart and mind.  They'll show up sooner than you think.  It’s time to pay that old man a visit and care for him!  Like a wise businessman, taking inventory of his stock, examine his motives, attitudes and goals.  The product of life is of more value than merchandise.  Work him over while he is still in a formative stage--before it’s too late.  You'll be more likely to meet a splendid, old man.  The man you'd like to be. 

God bless you.

         

( Written by the late Richard Halvorsen, Chaplain of the US Senate.)

Kinsley's Out There: Community

Kinsley's Out There: Community: "The guys downstairs This morning, I went downstairs and there were four guys sleeping in various places in the little house where I'm sta..."

Community

The guys downstairs

This morning, I went downstairs and there were four guys sleeping in various places in the little house where I'm staying. Last week, six guys from the orphanage, who just graduated, came here so that they could take their college entrance exams.  Now there are 22 guys and girls here. Give or take one or two.

What's interesting is that most of the guys were ones who didn't come to the camps for one reason or another and who never really connected with us.

Last night, we had a Bible study and most of them came, including Vitya, who hung out with us at the first camp (Tiger used to call him Curly, which may be part of the problem...), but shut down after that. As Anya was asking the group to explain what it means to be a Christian, I saw Vitya listening intently. I'm not sure what got through, but that he was listening was a bit of a miracle.

Family, celebrating my birthday.

The study was on Acts, and as we were reading  how the earliest followers of Christ freely sold their possessions and lived so that no one was in want, it was a reminder that we often miss out on the blessings that such living can bring. It was also a reminder that God gives us a place to belong, a place where we can be loved. Seeing the 22+ kids, thinking how they were all abandoned, abused or neglected, and are now finding a place to call home, made me think that this is what the Church should be about.

Maybe that is what Vitya was experiencing for the first time.

Colony Visit

Lydia, Ira and John at the festival

It had been over a year since I'd been able to get into the juvenile prison colony due to red tape and scheduling conflicts. This past Saturday, Sergei, Lydia and I finally got to get into the colony and it happened to be a festival day, where the guys were doing skits, singing, dancing and doing acrobatics. Most of the guys were there as were many officials and at the end, I got a chance to thank them for their openness to letting us in and got to present them with a laptop and LCD projector that we were able to purchase for them.

Sergei, Lydia and I also got a chance to invite all of the guys to the Bible study, which was great, as there were 80 new guys from other colonies that had just closed.

Guys doing acrobatics

When it came time for the small group, guys just kept coming. We ended up with about 35 or 40 and at least 10 were from the other colonies. Sergei, Lyda and I started to share about what we do and why and then the guys started asking me questions about the juvenile "prisons" in America. I got to share about guys whose lives the Lord has changed, including Jason who was at Camp Squanto 15 years ago and who now is on staff with us at Straight Ahead Ministries, and about His love for them all. Then I asked them about their lives and why they come to Lydia and Sergei's group.

One boy, Vlad said that he comes to get closer to the Lord. He has repented and he now feels hope that he can make it. Sanya shared that his father killed his mother when he was 9 and that he started stealing when he was not much older than that. Sanya told us that he loves coming to Sergei and Lydia's group, but when he goes back to the rest of the prison, he often feels hopeless. That lead to a great discussion about Sergei and Lydia's love for him and for the other guys, and how that love comes from Jesus, who never leaves us, no matter where we go. Sanya started to beam.

When it was time to wrap things up, Sergei said that if any of the guys wanted to repent, if they felt like their faith was coming alive, that they should stay. A couple of guys left, but the rest stayed. Sergei  wanted to make sure that they understood so he told them again that they should leave unless they wanted to pray. No one moved and they all prayed. This is not something that they take lightly as they get harassed and put down for coming to the group and for becoming believers.

As we were leaving, there were a lot more smiles and hugs, and many guys asked when we were coming back. It's amazing to see hope and life come into hearts that have been so hurt and closed. We need to pray that they keep that light and share it.

Red and Yura

Deb and Red, 2001

On June 7, 2003, Ricky Garcia, a/k/a Red, went home to be with the Lord at age 22. He was one of those kids whom people loved instantly, who was a leader and who was as complicated as they come. He had been an addict for many years, but he never lost his humanity. A couple of years before his death, Red's faith had come alive and that gave him hope, a hope that he shared with others. He was one of Deb and my "keepers" who was always close, at least in heart.

When Red passed, it seemed like a lot of my heart went with him. But just a month later, I was back in Ukraine with our band, Svuki Bostona, even though I was still in a fog. As usual, we did a concert for the guys at the juvenile colony in Kremenchug. After the concert, a tall, tough looking young man was standing on the stage by himself. I got one of those, "go over and talk with him" nudges and so I went.

His name was Yura and he had been there for about a year. He was not a believer, but something was stirring within him. Yura shared about his life: he didn't know his father and he and his mother had come to Ukraine from Russia when he was 5. When he was 6, his mother sent Yura for a bottle of wine, which he dropped and broke. When he came home, she beat him and kicked him out. Yura lived on the streets and when the police would bring him to the orphanage, he would run away. His mother died when he was 9. When he was 13 the police arrested him and Yura thought that they had caught him for stealing food. They charged him with murder, held a kangaroo court, and he was sentenced to 10 years for a crime he didn't commit.

Me and Yura, June 2011

I can't remember much about the rest of our conversation, but I remember sharing about Christ's love and praying with Yura. Yura later told me that on that day, his faith and hope came alive; in a way, my hope came back alive too after it had been pushed down with Red's death.

Last week, on June 7, 2011, Yura called me. He had been released from the adult prison after serving the rest of his sentence. He was living in Kiev and wanted to meet as soon as possible. I was happy, but I was also apprehensive as I hadn't seen Yura in the 6 years that he had served in the adult prison system, a system that often breaks people.

We met and it was great. Yura looked healthy and he was enjoying life. He had a good church and was living in a hostel until he could afford a room someplace. Yura asked what I saw in his soul and I told him that I was happy to see that he was full of life. I also shared that I had worried about what I would see. Yura smiled and said, "I am a believer and Jesus never left me." As we left, Yura told me that he loved me and that he was thankful to God that I was his "spiritual" father. I told him the same and we made plans to meet again over the weekend, with an interpreter so we could talk more in depth.

When I contacted Yura the next day, he had decided to go to another city a few hundred miles from here as his friend had a place for him there and he could live for two months on what he could live on in Kiev for just a couple of weeks. Part of me was happy for him, but part was bummed that he would not be around. That is pretty typical with the guys and girls with whom we work. Then again, I guess that's part of "spiritual" parenthood.

Life is full of comings and goings, but what a blessing it is when we get glimpses into the connectedness of it all. 

Please keep Yura in your prayers (and Pasha, whom we still have not heard from since he left the house in Zolotonosha) as he works through his freedom for the first time in ten years.

Highs and Lows

Luba and her boys from the camp.

It's interesting that Psalm 22, which starts out "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? Far from my deliverance are the words of my groaning..." and goes on with David crying out for help, is followed by Psalm 23, which starts out, "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures..." and goes on to extol the hope and peace that we can have in the Lord.

That intertwining of heartache and joy, peace and despair, are a part of being in ministry with kids who live on the edge of so many things. We cannot be like social workers who are taught not to become personally involved in the lives of their clients, as Christ calls us to do otherwise.

This past week, I got a call from Sergei who was heartbroken as both Igor and Pasha  left the aftercare home last weekend. Igor took some things and just left-which is his pattern in life. Pasha, for some unknown reason, decided to leave and wouldn't say why. Sergei sees Pasha as a son and this is a tough thing. I've been through that myself, too many times, and it hurts. It helps us to remember that people have to make their own choices and that the Lord gives each of us free will to do so, but it's never easy. Please pray that Igor will be safe and pray that Pasha will come back. And pray for Sergei too.

Shkasia and his new buddy.

This past week, we were sitting here at the house, when Bogdan looked at me and said, "I'm so happy. You know why? This is a dream come true for Anya and me." We were looking at photos and talking with the guys and girls who have lived here at the Safe Haven house, just after they returned from a camp that they put together and ran for kids from broken, destitute homes. Andrew and Jenny Kelly do outreach to those kids and this was a special time for them to get away from the hell of home.

All of the kids who lead the camp grew up in the orphanage and became believers through camps or through living here. Now, they are helping the kids they once were and they were so excited about it. I kidded with Bogdan that we can now retire since the next generation is keeping things going.

Thank you Lord for that and for keeping us going when we don't have the strength. That is a great gift.

A boy, a dad, and a car

I have always loved cars and still enjoy getting my Car and Driver magazine each month when I'm home. Cars and young (and not so young) men are kind of a universal match.

The Lada, Bogdan and Seroja

A few months ago, one of the guys here at the house, Seroja, bought a 40 year old Russian Lada from one of Bogdan's friends. Often times, I've come home to see Seroja, his fiance Yana, and some of the other guys and girls from the house just sitting in the car listening to the radio.

The car needed quite a bit of work and it's been awesome to see Seroja and Bogdan working on that car together, as a son and father. Such a simple thing, but one that wouldn't have happened if Bogdan and Anya had not made this group of people a family.When I see these things it makes me think of all the day-to-day events that we take for granted as "normal", which are anything but that for so many kids who grew up in orphanages.

Today, I was sitting here and looked out the window and saw the two of them putting on a new grille--again, a universal thing with guys and cars is that you have to make them unique and "tuned" as possible. Seeing such interactions and seeing Seroja and the others enjoying a such simple things is really a blessing. God still has a way of making something out of nothing, even in the little things of life.

It is Good Friday

 

When I was a child, I could never understand how this day could be called Good Friday. I would sit in the church and look at the crucified Christ and wonder how His death could be Good. I understand now, from the theological point of view, that it is Good because Jesus' death allows us to come back to a unity with God that our sin had destroyed. Yet there are times when that Friday so long ago just doesn't seem good.

 Today, I was in bed recovering from a mild case of the flu and I found Franco Zeffirelli's Jesus of Nazareth on YouTube. When I first became a believer at Boston University, with the help of my then roommate Jim Vivian, we wanted to watch Jesus of Nazareth on TV. But neither of us had a TV so we went throughout the dorm looking for one. When we asked one guy if we could borrow his set, he asked what game was on. When we told him, "Jesus of Nazareth, you want to watch?", he looked at us strangely and said to just take the TV.

I remember watching the series and being in awe of what was happening. As I watched the final segments today, I cried a bit and felt a love in my heart for the Lord that sometimes gets covered up in the day-to-day.

Some of those tears were helped by missing Deb a lot this week and some were from the fever. But most were from a place that needed to be touched by God's Love.

Sergei, Pasha and Igor

We all need that touch. This past week, I got to spend time with Sergei, Pasha and Igor at the rehab house in Zolotonosha. A group of guys from New Hampshire is interested in coming over and repairing the second floor of the house as it is falling in (not a good thing) so I needed to get some photos. As I was there, I saw how Igor is like a child in many ways, especially when he is around Sergei. Igor never knew his parents and grew up in an orphanage. After he turned 18, he lived on the streets and at places all over Ukraine, never for more than a month.

A couple of years ago, Igor found his mother and was so excited that he bought her roses, candy and other gifts and went to her door. When she opened the door, Igor saw his own face before him and she saw hers. Yet in an act of brutality that is hard to understand, his mother told Igor that she didn't want to see him and started to shut the door. Devastated, he threw the gifts at her and ran away.

Until recently, Igor has kept running. But he is learning about a Father who never shuts the door to His children. He is also finding that there is a love that allows others, like Sergei, to love him more than he has ever been loved before.

Tony Campolo used to say,"It's Friday, but Sunday's comin'." Igor's and many others' lives are full of Fridays, but thank God we have a love that comes from a special Sunday so long ago.

Христос Воскрес! Christ is Risen! Happy Easter.